Monday, November 25, 2013

Drying Out

I've been 21 for just over four months now. It's been a good run—honestly. I've drank great beers, been to great bars, and spent all kinds of money that I don't have. Grand Rapids is a great place to be when you’re young if your liver and wallet can handle it. My problem is I can’t handle it right now. It’s not you beer, it’s me. 

Having a beer blog is ton of fun. I get to drink beers and write about them as often as I want. I get to learn about the beer making and beer drinking processes. I usually dedicate more time for “research” for this blog than I do for my college classes. I initially started this blog for a journalism class, the professor wanted us to get in the habit of writing every day and getting our words out there on the interweb. I thought for a long time about a central topic that would keep my blog on track. My roommate kept telling me to write about craft beer because I love it so much. She said “Kellie, you’ll never run out of things to talk about. If you need inspiration just drink more!” Thus Girls on Hops was born.


That worked for a while. I was drinking a beer or two almost every night—it was for a class after all. Plus, I was honestly just trying to educate myself and others as I imbibed. 


Before long I stopped writing as frequently as my grade required. I stopped brainstorming ideas for new ways to talk about beer and I lost focus. Instead of drinking and writing, I was just drinking cheap beer, or craft beer solely for the alcohol content. It’s a slippery slope writing a blog about something that pretty much acts as a poison when you drink too much. As a youngin’ in the world of inebriates, I haven’t learned moderation as well as a beer blog demands. Instead, on the weekends I find myself drinking too much, too fast and too often.

After a string of wicked hangovers and foggy memories from the nights previous, I’ve decided to slow down for a while. I’m letting my body reset. I still have to write a blog for my class, and can continue to educate myself on the booming beer industry, but I have to let my favorite quote “Write drunk; edit sober” take a backseat for a while. In the meantime, I’ll be acting as a stellar designated driver, talking about beer to other beer nerds and learning a bit more self-control. I hope to emerge with skills in knowing my limit and giving my liver a fighting chance. 

To keep me accountable my roommates created this in my honor:


As you can see my roommates are pulling for me—kind of. On the left you have the tally of my consecutive days sober. On the right you have a countdown to a kegger that my roommates are more than excited for. Maybe in 12 days I'll drink a beer, not half the keg.

I don't have a concrete goal in terms of "consecutive days sober," but I'll keep you posted on my dry days as well as frequent postings about the craft beer world. Feel free to have a beer in my honor in the time being, or maybe take a little break with me. It's up to you.

Friday, November 22, 2013

Foundations for a Great Beer

Water is super important for our bodies, and our environment and blah, blah, blah—you know that. Maybe what you didn’t know is the importance of water quality in beer. As one of the four main components the region and cleanliness of the water you use for your brew can make a huge difference in the final product.


Over 95% of beer is water, so brewers select water with the same precision as they chose their hops, malt, and yeast. This isn’t prison wine that our artisan brewers are making, it’s craft beer. Brewers actually attend regional water tastings to select a supply of water with the best mineral composition. Call me crazy, but I’m not making this up.

Home brewers can even submit a sample of their tap water to WARD Laboratories to find out if the water has the optimal level of ions and minerals for beer making. Usually when we brew at my house, we get purified spring water just because our tap water isn’t quite up to snuff. To make the best beer you have to start with the best water. That's what all of the popular microbrews do.

A lot of microbreweries apply the same snobbiness to their quality of water as well. Rogue Ales always points out that their beer is brewed with “free range coastal waters.” Right Brain Brewery in Michigan supports clean water acts because the water used in Right Brain’s brew is taken from the West Bay in Traverse City. Left Hand Brewing utilizes the crisp Rocky Mountain springs to give an extra push of quality to their awesome brews. Plus, when microbreweries depend on a steady and clean supply of water for their product, they usually push to keep the water source that way. So I guess when we drink  craft beer that uses top-notch water, we're saving the environment. Go us.

On the topic of water, while drinking you should definitely hydrate. I usually am told to drink a glass of water for every beer that I drink, but I just don’t have enough room in my stomach to hold it all. I’m getting better though. My nurse roommate is threatening to hook me up to an I.V. soon if I continue my route of dehydration. So, what have we learned? Water is great for beer and for your body. Super simple stuff. 

Wednesday, November 13, 2013

Baby Steps to Experimental Beers


I’ll admit that I’m not the most adventurous person when it comes to trying beer. I like my stouts, my porters and my IPAs. Sometimes I’ll buy a bottle of beer that I know will be good versus buying a Flying Dog Pearl Necklace with oysters that could very well taste like ass. I’m trying to get into the world of unique and experimental beers—I’m just taking baby steps. Lately, I’ve been looking for flavors that aren’t always featured in beers. Right now waiting to be tested is one beer with juniper and one with habaneros. I’ll try beer with oysters, bacon, and smoked pig’s head eventually, but let me take my damn time.

This first step on the road to experimental beers was a Chicory Stout from Dogfish Head Brewery. I know that chicory isn’t that strange of an ingredient, but let me take this victory.  Chicory root in case you don’t know what it is, is a common coffee substitute and additive (especially in New Orleans). The root is roasted, then ground, and adds an almost coffee-ish flavor to things…like beer.  Most people say that chicory is notably nuttier, woodier and a tad bitterer than coffee—at least that’s what Wikipedia told me. Some people say it’s really not like coffee at all. I kept this all in mind as I was drinking my Chicory Stout. 

I poured this into my new English Pub Glass and the brew was black with a fairly decent cream colored head. A woody/spicy/roasty/coffee-y smell could be detected right after the pour.

The taste predominately had black coffee flavor. The brew features organic Mexican coffee as well as the chicory, and it’s obvious which one they used more in the brewing process. The real hint of chicory comes after the black coffee flavor subsides and earthier and chocolatier notes pop out. Overall, I liked it but wished the black coffee taste was less in-your-face. Plus, the body was thinner than I was expecting after the initial head on the pour.

I’ll keep my eyes peeled for crazy beers to write about. Calling this chicory beer slightly experimental is a bit of a leap. If you have any suggestions for me, feel free leave the names in the comment box. If it wasn’t a potential awkward situation I would ask you to send me new beers to try, but this is the internet, and some things aren’t okay to do on the internet. 

Monday, November 11, 2013

Liquor Mixed with Beer: in the Clear

Everyone knows the drinking rule of thumb that goes "liquor before beer in the clear; beer before liquor never sicker." Right? Some people swear by it, but in my case if I switch back in forth between poisons I will always get sick. Here's a new trick: make a cocktail out of beer and liquor, drink at the same time, your body will be confused, you wont get sick. It's fool proof.

But really, beer cocktails are happening, and people seem to like them. With the extensive flavor options of craft beer available right now, it's actually pretty easy to mix beer with other alcohols and get a great result. Just be careful not to overdo it, these are classy craft beer drinks...not a vat of jungle juice at a frat house.

New recipes are for beer cocktails are popping up all the time on the web, but I've found some simple stand-outs to feature right now to get us going.

1. Corrido Prohibidos
I've never had luck when I drink beer, and then tequila, and then beer again, and then a quick shot of tequila as my nightcap. But maybe, just maybe, if I drink them at the same exact time I'll be A-OK.

Recipe:
2oz tequila
6oz Mexican beer (Mexican craft beer of choice: Cerveza de los Muertos, )
lime wedge
feel free to salt the glass if you're into that sort of thing
Cerveza de los Muertos: Beer of the Dead

Preparation: Pour tequila first, then tip the glass and add your Mexican craft beer. Place the lime on the glass and enjoy. For best results only drink one or two to avoid getting into a fight, going to jail, or waking up naked in a stranger's front yard.

2. Redneck Mother
Prepare this in a mason jar, sit in a rocking chair and eat something deep-fried. This "beer-tail" has a definite southern twang.

Recipe:
1 oz grapefruit juice
1 oz sloe gin
4 oz blonde ale
2 oz ginger beer (i.e. Good Juju)

Preparation: First add the juice and sloe gin to the bottom of your drinking vessel. Next add in your blonde ale, and whatever room you have left in the glass top off with the ginger beer. Sip slowly and then boom: it's instantly summer.

3. Lay Lady Lay
I love Bob Dylan, so naturally if a beer-tail is named after one of his songs I have to drink it. I don't even like lambics, but I'm doing this for Bob.

Recipe:
2 oz fruity lambic (try Upland Brewing's Raspberry Lambic)
2 oz sparkling wine
1 oz ginger syrup
a couple of fresh berries

Preparation: Dump the lambic, sparkling wine, and ginger syrup into a wine glass. Plop in some ice cubes, give it a swirl and toss in your berries. Take dainty sips as you slow dance with your cat to "Lay, Lady, Lay."

4. Hangman's Blood
This is the Godfather, the Papa Burgundy, the Master and Commander if you will of beer-tails. This beer cocktail is designed to put hair on your chest no matter your gender. Drink with caution.

Recipe:
1 oz gin
1 oz rum
1 oz whiskey
1 oz brandy
1 oz port
5 oz stout (recipe calls for Guinness. I say use your favorite craft stout)
4 oz champagne

Preparation: Pour all five shots into a big-ass glass. Add your stout. Top off your combination of poisons with some champagne. Drink. Try no to die.

These are just a few beer-tail recipes that are out there. Beer infused cocktails are getting pretty popular, so don't feel like an alcoholic when you experiment with different recipes. Also, feel free to create your your own mixed drink concoctions. If you come up with anything good tell me about it immediately: in case you can't tell, I like to try new drinks.

Thursday, November 7, 2013

Brace Yourself: Winter Beers are Coming

The Christmas beer season is upon us. I don’t care that Thanksgiving hasn’t happened yet. I don’t care that it’s technically “autumn.” I don’t care that I still see leaves on 40% of the trees surrounding my house. I like new things. And I love that a whole season of craft brews are starting to pop up on the shelves.

My kick-ass craft beer store Siciliano’s stocked their impressive shelf space with the first round of winter ales last week. This week I’m finally drinking them. There are a ton of seasonally spiced brews, so instead of bah-humbugging that it’s only November, start drinking instead.

Since Grand Rapids had some snow flakes today, my first beer of the winter season was a Yellow Snow IPA from Rogue brewing out of Oregon. Yes, I bought this beer because of the hilarious name. No, it did not taste like snow covered in piss.
Fun Fact: Yellow Snow IPA was first brewed for the 2000 Winter Olympics in Salt Lake City
Yellow Snow IPA clocks in at pretty drinkable 6.5% ABV. This ale features Amarillo Hops. A definite bitterness was prominent start to finish—but it wasn’t too overwhelming. Grapefruit and lemon zest meshed well with the bitterness and kept the brew fairly complex. Other standout flavors included pine, earthy malt and a little floral essence. Although this IPA follows suit with classic bitterness, Yellow Snow IPA still manages to be slightly sweet and fruity. Just because it looks like pee from a dehydrated person doesn’t mean it has to taste like it. Nice job Rogue Ales, teaching people that appearances and names aren’t everything. We can all take a page out of Rogue's book.

I’ll also be reviewing winter beers that have NOTHING to do with urine this season. So, if you can’t stomach Yellow Snow stick around, I’ll have jollier brews to get you in the Christmas spirit. Tis the season—almost. 

Tuesday, November 5, 2013

Hops Candy

It's been less than a week since Halloween, which means all of the Halloween candy that you tried to avoid throughout the spooky season is now 50-75% off. If you haven't indulged and did not wake up in a pile of chocolate wrappers, good for you, way to have self-control. If you did eat your weight in chocolate over the weekend here's a different type of candy to try: candy made from hops.

I tried hop candy a while back and I'm still not sure what I make of it. Essentially it's just sugar with a bit of hop oil. I had a variety pack that featured multiple varieties of hops (Cascade, English East Kent Golding, Saaz, etc.). I tried a Cascade flavored candy about the size of a jolly rancher. It took a long time to disintegrate and I'm pretty sure it gave me my first cavity.

It was super sweet with a piney/floral hop taste that wasn't bad, but wasn't that good. I've also tasted malt extract and tried wort on it's own before, and I could pull out an unfinished wort essence. Somehow, the sweetness, bitterness and earthiness didn't quite fit together. I want to try another flavor of the hop candy because I'm curious...but at the same time I don't. I definitely would prefer to drink my beer rather than let the non-alcoholic flavorings rot my teeth.

This is a fairly harsh review and I blame the sugar hangover of the post-Halloween season. There are probably some craft beer lovers that would squeal with delight as they savor this candy. Also, this a pretty decent gift for beer-heads (are you thinking about Christmas? I am.) who might want to get the hops flavor without the buzz of a drinking a beer. At least try a piece or two before you swear it off forever. Basically what I'm saying is, If I get a cavity, you have to get a cavity too.  

You probably can't find these in typical candy stores, so your best chance at buying hop candy is from your favorite beer store.Typically a 4oz bags of the candy sell for roughly $5. Maybe your craft beer store will sell them individually so you can give it a test taste before investing in a whole bag. Then we can visit the dentist together. Doesn't that sound like fun?